Stop Being So Grateful

Have you ever sent a thank you note with an intention of getting something in return?

Gratitude is huge in the self empowerment and law of attraction movement and it is starting to drive me crazy. How many blog posts, e-mails, or speakers have you read, received, or listened to have told you that you need to be more grateful? They espouse a philosophy that if you are more grateful, then the universe will provide you with more wealth, more happiness…more, more, and more.

Before dangle me upside down and pull out my toenails, I want to let you know that I don’t think being grateful is a bad thing, but have you ever felt that someone was being grateful for the wrong reason? Have you ever been grateful to someone…expecting them to give you something in return for your gratitude?

Don’t be ashamed if you have. It is human nature to want to accumulate goods, capital, or even attention. We have an inherent lack mentality, so we try to find ways to get what we desire.  This can be more business, more referrals, or more physical companionship, so when someone tells us that we can get more by being grateful, we will be more grateful

What is the result?

Giving false gratitude, disappointment when your gratitude is not returned, and a feeling that you have to give something in return for every kind act bestowed unto you. False gratitude builds a sense of hollowness within our souls and makes us feel like plastic people who have to keep smiling all the time even when we want to scream and yell at someone for being slimy.

What is the cure?

Being grateful is not a bad thing. It is very healthy to thank people for helping you, giving comfort, or being a customer. You should not hide the fact that you are grateful for what someone has done for you, but don’t then turn around and use your gratitude as a platform for getting something in return. When you EXPECT a referral for sending a gift basket in gratitude for a sale, EXPECT a favor in return for a favor, or you expect to be loved when you demonstrate love – you are setting yourself up for disappointment.

Be grateful for no other reason then to be grateful. Gratitude has its own rewards and you should not be expecting something great to come out of your kindness.

When have you experienced false gratitude? How will you be grateful today?

Be Sociable, Share!

• 

No related posts.